Friday, 17 June 2011

Blog overload

My blogging life

Wow, talk about blog overload.  I spent yesterday afternoon reading various blogs and now I am scared.  In my mistaken naivety I thought that I would just come on here, blog away, and by some mysterious power I would find people and they would find me.  Now that I have read all about what I am supposed to do I am feeling totally overwhelmed. 

I will happily make my page pretty at some stage.  I like doing that sort of stuff and it is a great distraction from whatever I am supposed to be doing on the computer, like planning next term for my kids schooling, or writing up what they have been doing, but I didn't realise the importance of doing so.  I am in the "so no idea" category that I didn't realise people ran blogs as, or for, businesses.  Don't get me wrong, I did know that people have blogs on their business websites but I never really connected things.  Oh well, I am sure I will get there.  I am still having trouble finding my own blog on here though, let alone anyone elses.  In time I am sure I will work it out.  Until then I have decided to just have some fun.  I admit I was incredibly excited to receive my first comment - a welcome.  Yes I am such a dag but hey I promised to be honest.

Anyhow, dorkiness revealed let's move on.  I can see the addictiveness of blogging, I returned to my computer several times in the early evening yesterday, when I should have been in the kitchen cooking dinner, because I thought of things I wanted to ask.  Also an idea would hit me and I wanted to try it out.  Yes I am a tad impulsive.  In the end I was left with a question, why do people start blogs? I am really curious to find out. I hope eventually people let me know.

The way I see it, they are time consuming, a lot of effort and potentially totally addictive.  For people like me dangerous to say the least.  I already have limited sleep time.  At some stage I really must say stop, enough is enough, but obviously that isn't today.

My writing life

When I started this, all of yesterday, I decided it was going to be predominantly about my writing experience, so here goes.  I have learnt a valuable lesson, unfortunately it took a while.  Do not write at night in the bedroom.  Just about every writing book I have read tells me that I shouldn't write at night because for whatever reason the writing is not as good.  I may well discover that is true but I haven't had much chance to explore the idea as yet.  I am not what you would call a morning person unless you are referring to the hours between say 1am and 5am, then I really am a morning person.  My body, or is it my mind, has made the strange decision that I don't need sleep, well not until about 4.30am, which really doesn't work in my household.  My husband's alarm has often gone off by then and I really should be up by 7am at least to get my day started. 

Here is what really happens.  I go to bed, my mind wanders, I am fascinated by the journeys it takes me on and I follow it, I watch my husband sleep, and I love my life.  Around 5ish I am getting tired but I am still partially ready to get up.  By 7 I just want to sleep the day away.  With this wet weather we have been having it is even more tempting.  Here is my dilemma - I home school my 2 children and I believe part of that is setting some sort of example.  Teenagers don't need any encouragement to sleep all day.  So, I drag my sorry butt out of bed and begin my day.  By this time it is probably more around 8.30am. 

Now writing teachers, as I mentioned, tell me I am supposed to write now.  Well, here's the facts.  The only functioning I seem to be able to do is to wake my daughter up, switch the kettle on, make a cuppa and say good morning to my son.  He is on a good phase of getting up on his own at the moment.  Even the cuppa has been known to stretch my capacities on occasions.  How you might ask. Well let's just say I have tried to make a coffee without the coffee and sugar?  I hope there is someone out there who has done the same.

Anyhow, to sit down and write now seems near on impossible most of the time.  The muscles in my hands haven't even began communicating with my brain and for some reason I like to write longhand now.  I do get excited when I look up at the clock and see it is before midday and I am writing though.  It's a real case of yeah I did it but I don't think it is what the teachers meant some how.  Maybe I will discover that all my writing is *#@$ as a result, and that would bother me, really it would but the thing is I still love to write.  Writing fills so many roles in my life.  It cousels me more often than not.  It helps me to understand myself and often it gives me a good stern talking to when I need it.  By looking into things I gain clarity.  The only clarity I find in the morning is that my body needs sleep!!!

Am I awake every night - well no.  Some nights exhaustion takes over and I sleep.  It's probably about a 50/50, 60/40 split.  Anyhow, that is me and I am used to it and I love the solitude of being awake when the house is asleep.  There is no demands at night, no phone ringing, no kids wanting anything, just me.  I think that is probably why I don't sleep, I like the me time.  In a busy house, filled with several teenage children that aren't my own more often than not, there is not a lot of quiet.  I am not complaining though.  I love teenagers.  They keep my young.  They also age me but like most things in life you have to take the good with the bad - don't you?

Anyhow, I started this with giving myself some advice that I know I will not take, but that is besides the point.  I did hear, I just didn't listen. I tried to tell myself not to write at night in the bedroom.  The reason I think this is sound advice is because my book, the one I am writing, and the other two that compete for space in my head, take up a huge chunk of my thinking time.  To encourage them to the surface while I am in my bedroom, sitting on my bed leading up to sleep time is inviting sleeplessness but I doubt I will change.  I do resist the urge to turn the light back on and just write a little bit more, well most of the time anyway, so that is an improvement.  I am so lucky my husband is a heavy sleeper.

It is getting on to a time when I feel I can go and look at what I was writing last night and continue the thread.  I hope so anyway.  Maybe there is a right and wrong way to do things and I understand self discipline is a good thing but what about individuality.  Surely that has to rate somewhere!

1 comment:

greenlabyrinth said...

Personally, I believe you should write when it's best for you. Not when a teacher says you should. Maybe it's a little anarchist, but I say write when you want to, or feel it. I write mostly at night before going to sleep. Or when my baby naps in the daytime, but usually thats reserved for catching up on emails and apparently commenting on here because that's what I'm doing right now. Do what's best for you. You know your own equation for your best writing. Sometimes it might suprise you. When I used to write, the best stuff came out of me at 3:00 AM. In the morning I'd go back and read it and think it was a crazy person writing, but that stuff always got the very best reviews. It helps you step out of yourself and tap into an alterego that may not exist during the everyday mundane life. Just my thoughts. Enjoyed reading this post. Keep it up!